It is very common for people experiencing a bad time in their lives or for someone who suffers from trauma to try and silence those uncomfortable feelings. We tend to run away from the unpleasant, we don’t like to feel sad or frustrated. So we decide to escape from that. The truth is that you have to feel it to heal it.
Explore with me how avoiding emotional pain is exactly the opposite of what can help to let go of it.
The key to resolving emotional hurt is feeling it
Contrary to what some might think, this does not mean living through a possible re-traumatization of a bad experience in your life, but the draining away of the feelings trapped and locked in the body.
It means allowing yourself to let go of the uncomfortable feelings that invade you in your darkest hours, as by doing so, your body and you are doing the actual healing work.
Trying to ignore or escape from the unpleasant or emotional pain only drives you to more frustration. And that stays in you longer, keeping you from moving forward and dealing with your internal struggles. Our body remembers everything and experiences are deeply imprinted in our cells.
If you don’t work through your pain, you will be delaying its possible effects in the future. That might have an impact on your relationships, with stress, or with your emotions. That’s the whole key, feel it to heal it.
As Hailey Magee, recovery coach, puts it: you are doing the work, it is important.
How do you feel it to heal it?
First of all, allow yourself to feel, knowing that those feelings have to have a place in you for the time being. Don’t try to push them away and avoid them. Sit with them and welcome them as part of the current you.
Permit yourself to not be ok. We all have sad thoughts, even bad ones. But that doesn’t mean we are going to act on them. Don’t let yourself identify too much with what’s going on inside your head, as it is the product of your feelings of unease and discomfort.
When we identify with our minds, with our thoughts, especially when these are bad or, at times, cruel we immediately tend to judge ourselves. The path to healing from what makes us feel uncomfortable is one where you need to allow yourself to be, free of judgement.
Let go of the pain. How do you do that?
Once you have processed and experienced your emotional pain, you will be making room for other feelings, such as peace, clarity, energy, or focus.
The key at this point of your process is to just be. Experience yourself in all of your forms or imperfections. Embrace the good, but also the bad, as all of these feelings offer something to learn from.
The real transformation will come when you start thinking of yourself as a whole, where mind and body are connected.
I work with everything, body + mind + soul, to me, all is one. Separate consideration usually only leads to the observation of the symptoms, not to holistic healing.
Working with your body, listening to the signals… is the first step. Feel it to heal it.
Looking for a way to heal from your pain?
This process I described where the road to healing necessarily needs for the person to experience pain might not be an easy one. But that’s where come in to help.
Tell me about who you are, your past or current situation, and I will walk with you on this road to personal transformation. I will help you navigate the difficult parts so we can get you exactly where you want to be. Hardships are always a little lighter when you have someone holding your hand.